Thursday, June 16, 2005

Why is healing so hard?

My wife and I are damaged goods.

We both have faults that could be listed long and often.

We are both painfully aware of when and how we let down each other, and what we should be doing/saying/feeling, but don't.

Also, we are desperately in love with each other. We are committed to serving each other, and sacrificing for each other.

All this most certainly applies to our relationships with our kids as well.

And, most importantly, we are absolutely committed to serving our Lord - following Jesus.

Now, with this as a backdrop, I have these questions: Why aren't we fixed? Why are we still struggling with issues that have been there from the start? Why doesn't God just reach down and fix us, heal us, make us who we know we could be, and want to be?

Here are a couple possible answers we've come up with:
1) God doesn't care. He could do it, but won't. His reasoning doesn't make sense, and it should.
2) God does care, but His reasoning will only fully make sense looking back from a distance, not in the present, and not trying to look ahead.
3) God doesn't work that way. We are outside His control on these kind of things.

I don't buy #3. The bible is too full of His intervention to accept this explanation.
I don't like #1. And, it seems inconsistent with the God of the bible, just like #3.
#2 makes the most sense. It seems most consistent with the God of the bible, and gives me hope.

But.

It does not take away the pain of being damaged here and now. No more character building, please, I'm full.

And.

It shows the level of luxury we live in, that issues of survival are so far off, issues of external peril are so removed, that an average guy with a pretty average job can ponder these things.

What's the missing ingredient in just about everything mentioned above?

Gratefulness.

What a blessing this life is! What incredible graces have been bestowed upon us, that we can be called children of God? Yes, life can be hard. Yes, tragedy touches us all. But yes, we are loved immeasurably. And yes, each day is full of new blessings, new graces, new chances for gratefulness.

Here's my goal for the next week: to end my day with gratefulness, and begin my day with gratefulness.

And in-between? Aye, that's the rub.

I'll give a daily report on this. Let's see how I do.

2 comments:

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